• Kesa Janes

50 Thoughts I Had While Watching The Weeknd's Super Bowl Halftime Show

On Sunday, The Weeknd took the stage at the Super Bowl 55 Halftime Show. He performed all his biggest hits while giving people meme ideas and looking deep into our eyes. The following are thoughts I had while reviewing this performance:


1. Looks very Vegas-y.


2. Just sitting there, chilling in the car.


3. It would’ve been cool if he made an entrance driving in the car.


4. That’s a lotta lights...guess you could say I’m blinded by them ;) 'kay, I'll go home.


5. Oops, guess he doesn’t need the car.


6. He just got out of the car, walked a few feet and sat down.


7. Who is that flying above him?


8. Is that supposed to be angel or something?


9. God, is that you?


10. Oh, bye.


11. Is that a choir of robots or something?


12. The choir looks like Invader Zim.


13. If you don’t know that show, Google it


14. I have no idea what he just shouted.


15. "Starboy" is a banger.


16. Does he ever wash that blazer? Or does he own thirty of them?


17. It’s been so long since the Weeknd performed without any bandages or fake blood on his face that I started to forget what he looked like


18. Why do his cheeks not look as pointed as they did from that picture a couple weeks ago?


19. He spent 7 million dollars on this show out of his pocket. Whether you loved it or hated it, he didn’t have to go full out for us.


20. Oh, it’s like one of those halls of mirrors you see at an amusement park.


21. That is a very unflattering close up.


22. When I was a teenager, I used to think this song was about him not being able to feel his face from kissing his girlfriend so much or something, but no- it’s about drugs.


23. *Insert memes*


24. I do have to give these guys credit for not tripping all over each other and bumping into the mirrors. I would be so lost.


25. I’m dizzy


26. This cameraman can probably smell The Weeknd’s breath.


27. I’m surprised he isn’t getting spit on the camera lens


28. Oh, Weeknd clones running around with bandaged faces.


29. I feel like he is staring into my soul, and I don’t think I like it


30. That’s a Bruce Almighty moon right there.


31. Ooh, those strings sounded like some Phantom of the Opera stuff and I like it.


32. Why are people saying this is the worst halftime show they’ve ever seen? It’s not THAT bad. Did they see The Black Eyed Peas?


33. I wonder how much money was spent on just fireworks for this performance?


34. I will say, something that people will NOT be criticizing this guy for is showing too much skin. I still don’t understand why people raised such a stink over J-Lo and Shakira.


35. I paused the show when they went to the field and counted at least 30 bandaged Weeknd clones in that one shot


36. Oh, that’s a lot more than 30.


37. I wonder exactly how many backup dancers there really are.


38. I wanna go see The Weeknd in concert now.


39. The moment everyone was waiting for: "Blinding Lights".


40. More fireworks.


41. I don’t think a lot of people realize that this song is about drunk driving to go hook up with someone. Just putting that out there.


42. My grandpa likes this song, and I think he’s one of those people. ^


43. He is looking at the camera so it's making me cringe.


44. Like, I think his eyeballs burned a hole into my head.


45. I took a film class once and one of the first things we learned was not to look directly at the camera.


46. I can hear The Weeknd perfectly fine when he’s singing but anytime he goes to shout something into the mic to get cheering from the audience I can't make it out.


47. More fireworks, and they are loud now.


48. Umm, why did people say that was the worst performance in history? There have been better *cough Bruno Mars cough*, but it was fine.


49. Final thoughts. Vocals were pretty good, effects were a little out there, and I wish The Weeknd hadn't stared into my soul.


50. I’m giving this performance a 6.5 out of 10.


*All rights to the video and music go to the NFL, The Super Bowl Pepsi Halftime Show, and The Weeknd*

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